Howdy again, folks!

By the time you read this, the NFL season will already be in full swing, with opening-week games having already taken place on Wednesday and Thursday. We'll pick up the action with a good matchup between up-and-coming NFC challengers, but that's not the thing I want to talk about right now.

Oh my goodness, no, we've got other fish to fry.

I didn't choose this week's college game because I think it will be close. In case you hadn't heard, Michigan has been embroiled in one of the biggest scandals in recent memory in college football, after a mysterious extra second was added to the clock that allowed the Wolverines to win a game they should have lost (and in fact, probably DID lose) over Western Michigan on a Hail Mary touchdown pass. Since that moment, the "phantom second" has consumed the college football world in ways that were previously reserved for only the most lurid off-the-field misbehavior. Investigations have launched, legal threats have been made, accusations of outright cheating have been lodged, and Michigan's recent history of astonishing levels of shadiness has found its way back into the conversation. Even the writers who make up the Associated Press poll have chosen to treat Michigan's questionable win as an actual loss, knocking the Wolverines down from #17 to all the way out of the rankings entirely. Not sure I've ever seen that before.

College football is a mess, folks, but at least it's an interesting one.

[NCAA] Oklahoma vs. Michigan - Saturday, 9/12/2026, 9:00 Pacific / Noon Eastern, FOX
Two weeks ago, I had this game circled on the schedule as probably the best matchup of the entire non-conference season. Michigan, under all-star coach Kyle Whittingham (really, he's one of the very best in the biz) and led by sophomore quarterback Bryce Underwood, represented a fantastic early challenge for an Oklahoma squad with designs on a playoff berth. But Underwood, while unquestionably talented, has been inconsistent at best, and the Wolverines got absolutely undressed by Western Michigan last week before winning (as mentioned earlier) with one nonexistent, manufactured extra second on the clock, while the Sooners made an absolute mess of UTEP in a 51-0 win. This game no longer looks like the pivotal early-season matchup it appeared to be two weeks ago, but with all the drama of the last seven days, how could I resist?

[NFL] Chicago vs. Carolina - Sunday, 9/13/2026, 10:00 Pacific / 1:00 Eastern, FOX
Last season, both the Bears and the Panthers found themselves riding unexpected bounce-back seasons all the way into the playoffs. Chicago quarterback Caleb Williams finally seemed to put it all together, and led the Bears to 11 wins, the NFC North title, and the divisional round of the playoffs, where their season ended on a heartbreakingly close overtime loss against the Rams in one of the best football games of the year. Carolina didn't have quite the same level of improvement, but quarterback Bryce Young seemed to find himself after a mid-season benching, and narrowly winning a bad division is still winning a division. The Panthers presented plenty of challenge to the same Rams team that knocked the Bears out of the playoffs a week later. Both of these teams will be eager to prove that last season's improvements were legit.

Okay, that's enough out of me - it's a fall weekend, and y'all should be settling in for a great day of watching football instead of listening to me talk about it. Enjoy the games, everyone - I'll be back next week with more Squares.